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Dubbed a "silent killer", loneliness is a problem that affects up to a quarter of Jersey's community – so what can we do about it? One islander has opened up about his own experiences of anxiety, and what he found helpful to feel "connected" again.
Kevin Proctor was nominated as a Community Champion during the 2022 Pride of Jersey Awards for his "tireless work" within the St Helier parish community.
In addition to his time as a course facilitator with the recently-closed Jersey Recovery College, Kevin was also behind the "happy to chat" bench initiative launched in 2019 to promote spaces for strangers to strike up a conversations.
There are currently around 14 benches around the island.
To mark World Suicide Prevention Day, he opened up about his experiences with loneliness and isolation and his advice for combatting the "silent killer"...
"At the time [of setting up the bench initiative], I was just getting into Jersey Recovery College as a peer trainer through my own mental health journey – and a part of that was loneliness and isolation," Kevin reflected.
"So the whole 'happy to chat' bench thing came about as we're delivering the courses, and it was to highlight loneliness and isolation."
He continued: "It is known as a silent killer. It lowers your immune system all the time on your own, so a big part of my own recovering journey was feeling connected again, getting involved with community projects, finding a purpose I suppose."
Pictured: Kevin was behind the "happy to chat" bench initiative launched in 2019.
A recent Opinions and Lifestyle Survey of 1,500 islanders found that a quarter of adults in Jersey often feel lonely, with those aged 16-to-34 feeling lonelier than older groups.
"It's very individual for every individual person – it depends on why they are feeling lonely and isolated.
"Some people like a bit of time to themselves, so it's about getting that balance right and recognising the signs when it becomes unhealthy isolation.
"It's normally the people around the person noticing a change in that person's personality."
Kevin also acknowledged that the pandemic had influenced levels of "disconnect" in society.
"It will have a ripple effect for generations and I do believe some people navigated it easier than others, but it would have affected communities, people, individuals everywhere."
Kevin stressed that green spaces such as parks were a "foundation for community" and "essential for wellbeing".
"Green naturally has a calming effect on a subconscious level.
"For me, I had quite severe anxiety and being in green space brought my anxiety down.
"Getting out in nature will heal you, and sometimes you might not even realise that it's helping you.
"Some people enjoy the beach and that can be naturally calming for them, being in water, some people [like being around] green spaces – it's about knowing where you feel calm and at peace."
Pictured: Kevin was nominated within the Community Champion category during the 2022 POJ Awards.
Kevin added: "A big part of my support was getting out with a dog. Dogs are nonjudgemental – they accept who you are, where you are, how you are and that's really powerful.
"We can be our own worst judges sometimes.
"Spend time in nature and with animals, that would be my big tip."
Kevin also noted the importance of "keeping conversations going" and letting those struggling know that "there is support out there no matter what".
"You can never have enough support in my opinion, but support starts with family, with community, and up."
FOCUS: Combatting the "silent killer" of loneliness
Fears Jersey youth facing "mental health epidemic" as self-harm surges
Anyone affected by any of the issues raised in this article or our World Suicide Prevention Day coverage can seek help from the following services:
Focus on Mental Illness: telephone 07797 710900 or email info@focusmi.org
The Listening Lounge (by appointment only): call 01534 866793
MIND Jersey: call 07829 933929, or access the drop-in service on Seale Street (Monday-Friday from 09:00-16:00)
The Samaritans: call 01534 116123
Adult Mental Health Crisis Line (open 24/7 for emergencies): call 01534 445290
Liberate: seek help via its online application form
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